Man, there are some times when you see a pair of girls so fine that it makes you wish you were into that whole "Lesbian Fantasy" thing.

You know man, you're about as boring a straight-man as you can get without being a damn prude.

Hey, I like girls in derby hats and bright red lipstick and classy black dresses.

Yeah, real freaky. Who the hell cares? I bet some girl would talk you into getting tied up and you'd just lay there, thinking about stock tips and how she has nice tits and that's about it.

Well, you're kinda supposed to just lay there.

Goddamnit man, no you ain't. And besides, you'd be spacing out, kinda enjoying it, but you got about as much kink in you as a Swede with straightener in her hair.

Shut up and bite my nipple.